There are 2 types of emotional pain. One is pointless and the other not. One can lead us to another way of living and the other to a place from which it is hard for us to see a way back. Pain can be a great motivator. Never underestimate its worth.
Pointless pain is wrapped up in personal pride and the refusal to see the linitations of ones own character. When I want to slug it out with fear and trembling then I usually suffer more than I would have. People are rarely smart when it comes to emotional pain. They tend to roll the dice and take a chance with it. Sometimes this works and others it doesn’t. It’s what you do when it doesn’t that changes things. Pain can be useful. I try not to lump it straight in the ‘no good’ category.