There Is Always Hope

There is always hope. Sometimes we might not be sure where to find it within ourselves but it is always there somewhere.

Once, when I was starting out on this journey of recovery and into new life, I asked a trusted friend about faith and the future. As he began to explain these things as he understood them, I told him that I couldn’t believe in what he was saying. He replied that it didn’t matter because he would believe it for me! It was quite a strange answer and I think I’m still trying to understand it today. But what I have come to see is that when I don’t seem to be able to find them, faith, hope, and love are always there.

I think it is a great relief to understand – if only in part – that love, faith, and peace are constant in this world and that they don’t disappear because they are obscured for the moment. It is part of the spiritual chestnut – we are believed in more than we believe in ourselves.

Exercise And Anxiety

In my experience, exercising when in the eye of an anxiety storm usually made me feel worse not better. When I first sought help about my anxiety, I was advised that whenever I felt an anxiety attack coming on, I should try some exercise. Apparently, this was thought to be a good way to reduce the tension.

On more than one occasion, therefore, I started running around the block when I felt the tension rising. As I pounded the streets, unfortunately, I found my physical symptoms simply got worse. I would push the barrier for a while and then jack it in as a bad job. I realise today that that particular exercise at that particular time was simply mirroring the anxiety attack itself. Everything that I usually did when hitting an anxiety wall – like running away, for example – I did again when I strode out onto the pavement in search of relief.

I still have friends who run miles or cycle until they can hardly walk because when they are doing it they are not thinking about much else. The problem is what happens between jogs or sessions at the gym.

Physical Exercise Is Not Enough

For me, rhythmic movement has a mesmerising effect. In asylums, you can see the obvious rocking motion of some patients. The great philosophers walked backwards and forwards in front of their classes, teaching with their hands behind their backs. This became known as the peripatetic style. Some people still practice this today – so there is much to be said for movement helping to calm the mind. But does keeping moving and regular exercise make a real dent in the problem?

Today, I understand that exercise has a calming effect on the body but for it has to be in conjunction with other stuff. Running, cycling, or pumping iron – or whatever – every day in order to stave off the feelings of fear and worry no longer fits the bill for me. I need to seek a loving God of my understanding, a regular house cleaning or confession, to be of some use to someone else, a mental pursuit which taxes and interests me, and a healthy lifestyle. These things offer a strong foundation and a fruitful routine which, in turn, helps reduce anxious and panicky feelings.

The Unaided Will

Modern western societies – and, increasingly, societies in other parts of the world – have torn down from the heavens the right of the individual to govern their own life and make their own choices. The realm of the spirit and the mysterious now plays a background role, filling in here and there where cracks appear in everything else.

It is from within this mindset that we – the angst ridden – seek to become easy within ourselves. And so, naturally, we are faced with unavoidable questions. The primary question is whether our problems can be reduced by the human will alone or through help from the medical or alternative therapy sectors. I believe that the way forward into healing is necessarily determined by how we name our problems – and so dictate where we look for help.

Choose A Path

If it as matter of self will, then we need to find a way to dig deep and muster the strength needed. If it is a matter of chemical imbalance or of a clear medical issue, then we are obliged to go to the correct authority on the matter and/or down the route of medication. If it is spiritual trouble, then we need to think about what to do in that regard. These are only suggestions concerning the choices we make about who we are and where our problems come from.

These decisions naturally affect the way we start looking for a way out. The ‘diagnosis’ points us down a certain road and that road we must follow until finally we feel better or realise that we don’t seem to be getting very far at all.

So, which path we are travelling, and is it bearing fruit?

Medication

Many people believe you should avoid medication when dealing with various emotional and ‘mental’ disorders. Such people are found in many walks of life, ranging from 12 step recovery programs to religious believers to everyday Tom, Dick, and Harriets.

Their stance is usually based upon their own experiences, which they then try to apply to the whole of humanity! I’ve heard many judgements about the use of prescribed medication in dealing with anxiety/panic and they are usually quite disparaging. There are, of course, those at the opposite end of the spectrum who would encourage taking medication for anything at all and think nothing of it. I’m only interested here in medication for anxiety disorders.

Resisting External Pressure

Judgements about quelling fear with chemicals usually involve making statements about the moral character of the person taking the medication. In truth, these statements usually reflect the weaknesses of the person making the judgement themselves. In their eyes, people who take medication in order to reduce their anxiety are moral cowards. In taking a short cut back to ‘normal life’ by using drugs, the ‘drug takers’ have forfeited their right to be respected. They have taken the easy way out!

I know people who have stopped their medication because of external pressure from third parties. It was suggested that prescribed medication masked the real issues and retarded genuine recovery. As you can imagine, the results were bad and took a long time to recover from. There are, of course, those who stop their medication and then go from strength to strength. The question always comes down to what is best for the individual.

You Know Best

My own opinion is that medication is a valuable tool – when used wisely. Problems arise when people start to avoid responsibility for themselves and put their ‘faith’ in medication above everything else. It’s easily done, especially if you have had a lot of pain for a long time.

And this is the crucial point: I never know what is really going on inside another person. So, I must limit my judgement to what I know about, which is my own own situation. Previously, I have fobbed off responsibility for myself onto doctors and medication – and ended up getting nowhere. Conversely, at times I have needed some medication and not used it. The result was that my suffering was longer than it should have been.

Whether or not to medicate is a tricky question that needs wise counsel and support. Above all, we must always try to avoid couching the debate in terms of moral fibre!